How to Stop Complaining & Start Living
Everyone has something to complain about and sometimes venting it is helpful.
But what if you are a chronic complainer?
The type of person that wakes up and wishes the weather was different and then just keeps on complaining all day through.
It seems to me that most complaints are implicitly tied to fear.
Fear, and the subsequent complaining about it, is crippling.
Why?
Because we associate the act of complaining with off-loading far more than we do with problem solving (that’s been proven in social studies).
As a result, we complain simply to get things off our chest, not to resolve problems.
This is known as ineffective complaining and it has been linked to higher levels of stress and anxiety.
Moaning that that the year is flying by is not going to make it slow down.
So instead of trying to avoid the underlying feelings of fear by complaining, why not simply face them?
How do you do this?
Firstly, you need to become aware of when you are ineffectively complaining.
Become mindful of the everyday complaints that have become routine (bad weather/ traffic) to the larger more valid worries (financial security/ job happiness).
Secondly, take some time to write down what is really concerning you.
There is no correct or incorrect way of doing this, just write without thinking too much or editing anything.
Thirdly, reflect on what you’ve written and notice if any beliefs and feelings arise.
Notice if these beliefs and feelings have any validity in reality.
For example, feeling unworthy can often lead to inaction, so identifying underlying beliefs can often lead to major breakthroughs!
Fourthly, take action and be kind to yourself in the process.
After all, you are only human, doing the best you can do with where you are in this present moment.
So tell me if you’ve managed to nip complaining in the bud.
Onward & Upwards
