How to Heal Jealousy, Envy and Feeling Left Out
Do you wish you had someone else’s success, looks or relationships? Do you often get envious of other people’s good?
We’ve all been there, in a moment of random social media scrolling or within a relationship where jealousy and envy take over…
Part of healing this by understanding that these emotions often stem from a form of inner inadequacy, anger, disconnection or sadness which is then mirrored by your external life.
The good news is that you are not alone.
In fact, this post is my highest read article. It shows me that this is something thousands of people are wanting to heal from. You deserve to move past jealousy and move towards feeling good and attracting joy into your life, work & relationships.
So stop feeling guilty or shameful for feeling jealous or envious because denying how you truly feels just hurts you in the long run!
That missing “thing’ in your life is actually a backhanded sign pointing your in the face of your desires.
In actuality, jealousy and envy have nothing to do with that person/thing or experience that you are chasing and has everything to do with you!
It’s showing you that, you are ready to stop playing small.
That you are ready to embrace your light, (uniqueness, gifts, talents) and your darkness (the things you try to hide from yourself and others).
And isn’t that amazing, how something that feels so difficult can be such a gift?
Here are some basic steps to get you started:
Step 1: Delete all of your social media apps off your phone for a week
Take back control and delete your social media apps off your phone for a minimum of one week. If you really need to log on and check what is happening, do so on your PC and set a timer for 5 minutes and then log off the minute the alarm goes off. Most of the time we all fall into the trap of random social media scrolling because it’s just so accessible to do so. When you delete the apps off your phone, it becomes easier to limit mindless scrolling which leads to sadness and envy. Take charge of your life and delete the trigger that is causing you undue stress. You can also take this one step further and unfollow anyone that triggers you feeling less than if you have to be on social media.
Step 2: Your envy is actually pointing you in the direction of your desires
It’s so easy to believe that envy is just this negative but in reality that missing thing in your life is actually a back-handed sign pointing you in the direction of your desires. That feeling of lack is actually helping you to gain clarity on what you actually want to experience in your life. The main issue is that most people get stuck in self-pity when they should be taking action. So what do you desire and can you do anything about getting it? If your answer is ‘yes’, awesome – take steps to get there. If your answer is ‘no’ then work on accepting what you cannot change because that in itself has the power to make you feel lighter.
Step 3: Focus on what feels good
When you fall into a state of envy re-focus your attention onto what brings you joy. It may seem hard at first (especially when you are sitting in your office feeling envious) but start to bring your awareness to what you are really grateful for. Mentally list the things that are working for you. Maybe that’s your health; your current job (even though it may not be your ideal job – it still pays the bills); your relationships or simply your ability to change anything that holds you back. Focus on what is working and then use that as a leaping board to go after what you actually want.
Step 4: Work on loving you
When you are in a state of envy and jealousy you have fallen into believing that you are less than. You can alter this by working on the quality of your self-talk. Begin by noticing how you are actually thinking and talking about yourself. Remember, radical self-acceptance means untangling yourself from external measures of worth and validation. The very things that social media is hinged on. When you cultivate a healthy inner dialogue you move away from placing too much attention on external criticism or praise. You can also listen to my audio course on how to move past envy and jealousy here.
If you could do with some more guidance and laser focused solutions on how to heal from jealousy, then check out my my audio-training below:
All my love,